Studying theology is a source of happiness, new things, thoughts, getting to know God's ways better, receiving stuff enough to be present in any discussion... These days are filled with Early Church History, so I'm very into reading the Apostolic Fathers and Eusebius' Church history. Does that time look like this time!
Last weekend we had a seminar about social justice, with Carl Raschke. He was o
ur guest for one night, and we had lots of good talks... to be continued for sure. And, oh my, a good friend of ours is photographer, and he was assigned to take some official pictures of Carl (for a Christian opinion magazine), but after the photoshoot with Carl, he announced that there was time for others to get a little photoshoot too.... -sigh- ... and of course our oldest daughter got me that far... I was in FRONT of the camera to get my face pictured in a serious way (not the freaky things that they accept on passports ;-d) ... for the first time of my adult life... My goodness, was that scary, but after some time I just saw some lens, and my grinn was not that unsure anymore...Music is a little too much behind: need to finish my introduction course to the part time Conservatoir I'm involved with... my poor sax is hiding behind some dust... just like my piano... and drums... and flute... -sigh- .... even singing is not as much a relaxing thing as it is stressfull... What is that? I used to live on music, and now it's 'too much work' for crying out loud. But, as a lovely teacher of mine always says: "For several artists there is a season for everything, and you have the seasons more strictly seperated than others" So I guess I'm not in the music season then.
Painting is going strong! I did organize the Winteracademy (part of the Christian Artists Union in The Netherlands), and the first weekend was a succes! The new way of doing this course is getting some attention now, so next year will be even more succesfull. The only thing is, though, that I am not allowed to advertise with the course in my own church... too bad I still don't know the painters in our church, so how do I find them then??
Our little group of arts students is happy with the initiative to get them together, talk about life issues and work together on some project or so. They are lovely, kids, in to anything, and vague ;-D so next time there will be more to feed and welcome in our home.
Just church is not what it's supposed to be. The emphasize is on coming to the sunday service. No community stuff. Not able to talk about that too.
I'm dying in there.
So now it's time for the last options to keep the relationship alive.
I feel like trying to stay, because it is a group of people that doesn't have much in common, just the sunday services (two of them). I know there are people suffering from that, not knowing how to change it other than walk away, to protect themselves from spiritually dying. I know there are spiritual gifts among the members of our church, that are not being used for the benefit of others, just because there is NO WAY of talking about it, let alone help eachother with learning it. I know there are artists among us and they don't know how to be the christian artist they want to be without hiding in their own homes, stating their art is just a 'hobby'.
But for me it's time for the last options. I'm slowly dying spiritually. It's in the final stages.
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